How to Deal With a Crazy Psycho Obsessive Stalker Ex – Part I: My Story

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Obsessive Psycho Ex_part_1She was a compulsive liar who had no emotional control over herself, and who acted out (sometimes violently, though she never physically abused me) in childish way when ever she felt so inclined. She was emotionally and mentally manipulative, controlling, and wanted to own me like a possession.

Does any of that sound familiar? Can you relate to that at all?

The first thing people say when they find out I’m a dating and relationships coach is “Wow! Really?!” The most common thing I hear next is “How’d you get into that?” And that’s when I have to reveal it was because I had been in the World’s Worst Relationship. In all truthfulness, there have certainly been worse, but it’s no exaggeration either.

There were some good things in our relationship, but I put up with compulsive lying, emotional outbursts, public scenes, professional embarrassments, a suicide attempt, drunken rampages, an arrest for evading police and leading them on a slow-speed chase through Boston, an arrest for trying to take her car off a tow lot without paying and biting the guy in the chest, the attempted murder of the mother of my children by sending cops to her house at 3 am one night hoping her aneurism would burst, and much, much more.

When we finally broke up… Scratch that. When I finally broke up with her, she refused to accept the break up. I started to move on and she would stalk me online and find who I was dating. She ruined a few relationships by asking the women I was dating how they knew her husband. I was never married to her.

I did everything I could to put distance between us. I blocked her emails, shut down my Myspace accounts, blocked her Facebook account, blocked her phone number and any number she tried to reach me from, and finally I created a fake last name for my online presence. (Yes, “Adams” is a fake.)

She continued to interfere in my life even though I left her completely alone. She would drive by my house in hopes of seeing me, she would do black magic spells to try to harm my kids and their mother and to win me back. She would send the mother of my children emails about who I was dating, trying to stir up the pot. There was nothing she wouldn’t try to do to mess with me.

She was obsessed and she wouldn’t stop. She went on for years and I did nothing to instigate her. But none of that mattered, she just kept coming. I felt helpless and I didn’t know what to do.

Finally, I reached the point where I was so done. I had to change my tactics because doing nothing wasn’t working. That felt horrible.
I didn’t want to go out and do things to provoke her, I didn’t want to ruin her life, I didn’t want revenge, I didn’t want conflict, and most of all, I didn’t want to drag her name through the mud. But I had reached my end point.

The rest of this series will be about why ex’s act this way, what they really want, the 6 stages of obsessive ex’s, 4 ways they’ll block a break up, what they are thinking, what you may be doing to keep their unwanted attention, why they come back when you least expect them, the emotions that a healthy ex has to deal with, how to get them to leave you alone, how to stop being the victim, how to get someone committed, how to be at peace and live a normal life, and the shocking conclusion to how my crazy finally stopped stalking me. And trust me, you won’t see it coming.

If you are dealing with or have dealt with a stalker ex, regardless if a woman or a man, I would love to hear from you.

Until next time!

 

Images courtesy of imagerymajestic/ FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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Matt Adams is a heart-centered Dating & Relationships Coach who helps his clients create their perfect love lives. All of Matt's methods are holistic, and include reaching deep into his clients inner core and helping them heal from the inside out, with many different holistic techniques. Matt believes that healing deep emotional and mental wounds is responsible for creating the long-lasting results that his clients benefit from after working with him. Matt has over 7 years of experience coaching, mentoring, and speaking to people within the realm of dating and relationships and to date he’s coached hundreds of men & women to success. He runs live seminars and classes in Boston, as well as online classes, group masterminds, and more. Matt can be found at: www.socialserendip.com & www.facebook.com/MattSAdams. Contact him if you want to join his FB support group for "Stalker Ex's".

About Matt Adams

Matt Adams is a heart-centered Dating & Relationships Coach who helps his clients create their perfect love lives. All of Matt's methods are holistic, and include reaching deep into his clients inner core and helping them heal from the inside out, with many different holistic techniques. Matt believes that healing deep emotional and mental wounds is responsible for creating the long-lasting results that his clients benefit from after working with him. Matt has over 7 years of experience coaching, mentoring, and speaking to people within the realm of dating and relationships and to date he’s coached hundreds of men & women to success. He runs live seminars and classes in Boston, as well as online classes, group masterminds, and more. Matt can be found at: www.socialserendip.com & www.facebook.com/MattSAdams. Contact him if you want to join his FB support group for "Stalker Ex's".

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